Marriage Tales



(shayamoya.co.za)


 There must be something in the waters because recently everywhere I go the people around me are getting married, getting engage or having babies. So it got me wondering whether or not there is something in the waters that the people around me are drinking - this then got me thinking about what my friend Nsuku said. She told my cousin Tlangi and I last year that we were behind with regards to our marital development and that it’s about time that we get a move on. I then started to think of my grandparents who are about to celebrate 50 years of marriage.

 Her statement got me wondering if I would be lucky enough to be married to the same man for 50 years and still feel joy every time I look at him. Now don't get me wrong, marriage I’m told is a wonderful thing if entered into in the correct context. Look I still believe in love - I’m just not sure if I believe in marriage…the way marriage is portrayed today does not make it very desirable for someone like me. I just want to be sure that when I take the big plunge into the unknown with someone, I can still laugh at his silly jokes afters years of marriage like my grandma does at some of my grandfather’s jokes. That my husband will have stories to tell me that I would not have heard of in our 50 years of marriage, and that we’ll both enjoy sitting in our bedroom together content to just be together in silence. 
 

I look at my grandparents’ marriage and I wonder if men like him still exist - men who still open doors, who hold your hand when you cross the street and who still get excited about telling you of the day you had. Now brothers don't get mad at me for saying such, I also know that I need to be a woman who is patient, because Lord knows we will be tested when the time comes, I need to be a woman of prayer because I know that my husband’s responsibilities by far outweigh mine but most importantly I need to learn to grow with my husband if we are indeed going to spend 50 years together we have to grow as one. Now reflecting on all of that I’m not entirely sure of this marriage thing, but my aunt assures me that it is girls like me who have no aspirations for marriage that tend to find it in the most random of places...I laugh every time I remember her look of shock and quiet confidence when I told her I wasn't sure about marriage as if she knew something I didn’t. 

Now with all that said, I wish all my married friends and those who are about to be married all the best - hopefully 50 years from now I will be writing a different version of this story...

                                   
  (eofdreams.com)



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